Days of Awe...

...is the name of a beautiful piece by R. R. Reno at First Things' On the Square.

Reno writes (on Kol Nidrei):

...this odd petition, presented in the legal context of formally constituted court, comes by way of heart-rending chants. There is not the slightest legalism in the music, which is among the most cherished in the Jewish tradition. Instead, it rings with desperate pleas. The chants sigh and sob. Jews do not kneel to pray; they stand. But in haunting melody of the Kol Nidre, I’ve found my Christian soul driven to its knees.

Therein, perhaps, lies the resolution to the paradox. It is as if the cantor and congregation were saying, “O Lord, I am a precipitous, presumptuous, impetuous fool. Please see that my eager spiritual efforts in the year to come are as likely to be motivated by vanity as obedience, self-interest as devotion.” As far as this Gentile can tell, the spiritual meaning of the Kol Nidre petition accords with the petition I make before I approach the altar to receive communion: “Lord, I am not worthy to receive you, but only say the word and I shall be healed.”

And the conclusion:

I am Christian and not Jewish. I have no real grasp of Hebrew and I only vaguely follow the prayers in my wife’s synagogue. Yet, in the final moments of Yom Kippur I have felt a terrible anguish, yearning to move, and yet immobile, wanting to rush to God’s side and yet nailed to my worldly life. I have shuddered as cantor cries out: “The doors are closing; the doors are closing.” For in those haunting words I hear Jesus saying: “Repent, for the Kingdom of God is at hand.”

Read the full post here.

Guest post: On the Yamim Noraim

The following is the first guest post for the days of awe by my best friend Jonathan Roush.  I hope to feature guest posts from him more often in the future...if we're lucky!

Right now the Jewish world is observing Yamim Noraim, "The Days of Awe". This is a time of personal introspection about our behaviour in the last year. We are supposed to recount and remember our sins towards God, to each other and to the world around us.
I've been actively trying to do this and it weighs heavily on my heart. Not in a negative way. I think that feeling the weight of our shortcomings is important to our growth as people.  It's not fun though.

How may times have I spoken negatively about people I know? People I don't know? How many have I judged in my heart?  How many laughs have I had at others expense instead of reaching out a hand of kindness to them? I can't even begin to count...
The ultimate goal of this "remembrance of sin" is that we reconcile ourselves with God, each other and the world around us. We ask forgiveness and take steps towards altering our behaviour. I don't know if this works...but I do know that it sure is nice to deal with some of these things proactively and then to be able to look forward with a clean slate as it were. It's like putting down a heavy bag.

And have you nothing to mend?

Whew! My last few postings have been pretty chock full of information. That's all well and good, but I really don't want to lose sight of the spirit of Elul--the main point of doing these daily postings.

So, let's take inventory. I myself have definitely been swept into the preparatory spirit of Elul this week as God, in His mercy, has been bringing to light unresolved issues in my heart, and giving me the impetus to repent, to forgive, to make a change. How about you?

As we continue to allow God search our hearts this coming Shabbat, I thought I'd finish out the week with the following encouraging story:

Once on the New Moon of Elul, the zaddik* Rabbi Levi Isaac of Berditchev [18th cent] was standing at his window. A Gentile cobbler passed by and asked him, "And have you nothing to mend?"

At once the zaddik sat himself down on the ground and weeping bitterly cried, "Woe is me, and alas my soul, for the Day of Judgment is almost here, and I have still not mended myself!" (Days of Awe p. 26)

As you continue to prepare for the high holy days, make sure to take time to ask yourself before God: "Have I something to mend?"

* A zaddik (or tzaddik) is a righteous or saintly person. Within Hasidic Judaism particularly, the tzaddik is seen as a true spiritual leader and guide, a person to whom the Hasidim should cling in order to strengthen their relationship with Hashem.